{3,000 Views Special Pt.1} Finally, it begins... and I don't exactly "luv" this album

Hi! So, after mentioning it in my countdown post today, I decided to finally begin the quintuple album review series. And I decided to start with the two most "predictable" album reviews of this all-over-the-place series, and save the more odd choices for last. I feel like some of you reading this may have expected this to be one of them. It's C,XOXO. So, I love Camila Cabello's self-titled debut album. I love Romance, possibly even more (First Man is one of my top 10 favorite songs of the 2010s, if not top 5). I'm not as familiar with Familia but that was a pretty good album too. But her new era is overall... somewhat of a disappointment. I think she's trying way too hard to seem "cool" just for marketing, with an entirely new look, edgier lyrics and style, countless collaborations with basically every overrated rapper ever, and a lazy album cover that's just a closeup picture of her, with her new blonde hair, licking a lollipop. I Luv It was really clunky, and I know you're probably tired of hearing everybody say this but it was an obvious Charli XCX ripoff. He Knows was another beyond underwhelming song. Hot Uptown was kinda alright, but still nowhere near the quality of even her slightly overrated previous singles like Never Be the Same, Liar, Don't Go Yet, etc, let alone even CLOSE to her best songs, like All These Years, In the Dark, Shameless, Easy, Feel it Twice, and definitely not First Man. The same person who wrote First Man also made... this album. But I thought it was at least worth a few listens, so I decided to share my opinion on every song. I gotta say, the album as a whole is better than I expected, but still not all that great. So, let's get into it.

1. I Luv It (featuring Playboi Carti)

My rating: 0/5 Terrible

So, we begin the album with the worst track, which is conveniently also the lead single. Great, a two-in-one weak first track and weak lead single. Most of my opinion still stands. First of all, the lyrics are laughably basic. The verses are just lists of random adjectives, and the chorus is "iluvitiluvitiluvitiluvitiluvitiluvitiluvit" a million times. And... this is the person who wrote First Man? The vocals are heavily autotuned and awkward-sounding, the production is just a string synthesizer going up and down over a generic beat, and Playboi Carti sounds like he was very drunk while recording his verse. Another thing about this that bugs me is a very weird and oddly specific issue that I've only ever heard in this song and Taylor Swift's Picture to Burn: that weird rapping/talking (in the post-chorus) sounds too close to actual melodic notes for me to be able to disconnect it from the music itself, which makes it sound almost like off-key singing. I think that probably applies mostly to people with perfect pitch like me. But, clearly, worst of all, this was an obvious sign of Camila changing herself to sound new and trendy, which I think is overall my biggest complaint about most of this album.

2. Chanel No. 5

My rating: 4/5 Good

Alright, this one's actually pretty decent. The production isn't completely lifeless and awkward, it's actually got a nice sound to it. The lyrics are alright, and they're not too repetitive for my liking. I certainly could have gone without the autotune, but overall it's not as clunky-sounding as in I Luv It. Overall I'd say this song is one of this album's more redeeming moments. I'll try to keep these reviews short, because my tendency to make reviews overly long makes it all the more likely that you haven't read nearly every single word of every album review I've ever created like I sometimes think while making my reviews.

3. Pink Xoxo (featuring PinkPantheress)

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Okay, I'm glad to see that PinkPantheress, of all people, made it onto this album where most of the features are mediocre rappers. But of course, her contribution to the album is on this interlude. I will admit, the lyrics are pretty strong. But like, this is very short, so not only does that mean the production (which sounds kinda cool I guess) doesn't go anywhere, but I sorta have no reason to listen to this outside of the album. It's a good song, but a song with this much lyrical and musical potential really should have been a full-length song instead of this short interlude.

4. He Knows (featuring Lil Nas X)

My rating: 1/5 Bad

So, I've talked about this one before. I think this grew on me a bit, but it's still yet another terrible single choice. But it's not a terrible song, just pretty bad. The production screams "Charli XCX ripoff", and other than in the bridge (which I actually like a lot more than the rest of the song), that synth sounds almost as obnoxious here as on I Luv It. But the lyrics aren't terribly written, just so out-of-character for Camila that it sort of takes away from my enjoyment of the song.

5. Twentysomethings

My rating: 5/5 Great

...okay, I didn't not expect this album to have songs like this. Production-wise, this reminds me a lot more of her early music than most of the songs on here. I really love how the instrumentation sounds here, it's a lot more acoustic and less messy and overproduced. Lyrically... well, it's hard to believe she used to be that young innocent girl whose mom made her include an edited version of Never Be the Same that removes a small drug reference on her debut album, and now she has this song with eight curse words in the lyrics? But really, the lyrics are relatable and surprisingly well-written. Great song on this mostly disappointing album.

6. Dade Country Dreaming (featuring JT & Yung Miami)

My rating: 3/5 Decent

So, this one's another one that's just kinda alright. The production's a bit weird, and the lyrics are repetitive and not super interesting, but it's better than a lot of the other songs on here. Most of what kinda saves it for me is the outro. I really like how the piano sounds on the outro, especially at the end of such a loud and very produced song like this. Not much to say here.

7. Koshi Xoxo (featuring BLP Kosher)

My rating: X/5 Doesn't count

So, similar situation to Saturn Returns when I reviewed Eternal Sunshine a few months ago. I'm not counting this towards my final album score. Not only is Camila absent from the track, but BLP Kosher doesn't really sing or rap at all. It's just a spoken interlude. I understand the point of it here, and I think it's a great inclusion to the album, but since it's just a spoken interlude, it's not really fair to rate this against the others as if it's a normal song. Alright, moving on.

8. Hot Uptown (featuring Drake)

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Okay... I've talked about this one before also. This is easily the best of the three singles, but it's obviously not a great song. The production at least does some interesting things, and the lyrics are alright. It's just super forgettable. I feel like every time I listen to this, I kinda forget what it sounds like immediately after. Well, that's definitely not the worst thing to say about a song, so I guess I don't have much of a strong opinion on this one.

9. Uuugly ("featuring" Drake)

My rating: 2/5 Mediocre

So uhhhh... at first I wasn't sure whether to even include this one or not. It's another interlude and it's basically just a solo Drake song, which seems like a weird inclusion on a Camila album. However, I decided to include it, just because unlike Koshi Xoxo, it actually has lyrics and music and real singing and real rapping. And Camila still sings a few backup lines here. Overall, this one's just meh. It's insanely forgettable, and the lyrics aren't great. Obviously I'm not a huge fan of Drake, and honestly this could have used a bit more Camila. Also, this one suffers from the same problem as Pink Xoxo in that it's just way too short for it to be a song I frequently go back and listen to. It's a bit longer, but it's still under two minutes so it hardly counts as a proper full-length song.

10. Dream Girls

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Wow, this album review has been very pink. This one is alright, but nothing too amazing. It's kinda catchy and the production sounds cool, a bit reminiscent of Familia-era Camila in a way. I don't quite understand the lyrics. She lists a bunch of people's names in the chorus, and I think this song is about memories from her childhood I guess. So it's got a good concept, but it's just not all that interesting.

11. 305tilidie

My rating: X/5 Doesn't count

Okay... I was not expecting two songs, on C,XOXO of all albums, to not even count to the album score. I actually love this one. It's quite a touching inclusion, as it's about her early days in Miami and times of happiness that have left her. But she doesn't sing on it. It's another spoken interlude. So, it's not a proper song on the album. It's great, but like with Koshi Xoxo, it just wouldn't be fair to count this as a song that affects the rating of the album.

12. B.O.A.T.

My rating: 5/5 Great

Wow, Camila made a synth song where the synth doesn't sound obnoxious! Yes, some might argue that that cacophony of synths in the post-chorus sounds annoying, but I don't think so, as you can still hear the melody, and the sound is pretty quiet and atmospheric compared to many of the other songs on the album. Lyrically, it's pretty strong. No, the "head"/"bed" and "friend"/"end" rhymes don't completely ruin it, as it doesn't feel totally forced. It's actually a breakup song, possibly about Shawn Mendes. Honestly I think this reminds me the most of her earlier music. This sounds like it could have been on Camila or Romance, and in a great way.

13. Pretty When I Cry

My rating: 4/5 Good

So, the last few tracks on this album seem to be more "returning to her roots" in a way, and if only they were the singles released before the album, I might not think she was trying to change herself for this era. This one, however, is just good. The production is okay, but it's got some weird elements that don't sound all that good. But I like the lyrics. It's another breakup song, but a more positive one about moving on strongly. Sure, that's a concept that's been done to death in pop music, but it's done well here. Pretty good song for the near-end of the album.

14. June Gloom

My rating: 4/5 Good

Alright, we've reached the end of the album. And it's another breakup song, and it's done very Olivia Rodrigo-style where she mostly talks about the ex's new partner. Who just so happens to be Sabrina Carpenter. Wow, I'm not sure I like Sabrina anymore, because she's stolen two of my favorite artists' boyfriends now. In all seriousness though, this is a solid album closer. The synth production actually sounds pretty cool and it evolves as it goes on, and the lyrics are well-written, but the outro... I don't get it. Could someone explain that outro to me? It just sounds weird and out-of-place for the end of a song like this. But it's alright, it doesn't take away that much from the song.

Conclusion

Overall album rating: 62% (Decent Album)

Okay. This album may not be the greatest thing ever, but that's mostly just because a lot of it, except the last few tracks, seemed too forced and out-of-character for a Camila album for me to fully enjoy it. But I still love most of Camila's music. This album just isn't doing the same thing for me, which is why it gets a lower score than any of her other albums would have.

Favorite songs: Twentysomethings, B.O.A.T.

Least favorite songs: I Luv It

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!