The Top 10 Worst Songs Of 2024

*sigh* Since you waited two months for me to come back and post something else, and last year you waited four months for me to release my 2023 year-end posts, I'll just give it to you now.

The music of 2024 was a double-edged sword. This year gave us wonderful artists like Sabrina Carpenter, Chappell Roan, and Gracie Abrams, who had previously fallen under the radar of the general public but are now finally becoming huge stars. It also gave us great new music from artists I love, like Billie Eilish and Ariana Grande. And obviously, it gave us a whole world tour from Taylor Swift (happy birthday) and a new double album from her, with 31 tracks. However, there were inevitably still plenty of songs that played on the radio in 2024 at some point or another that just... aren't that good. And these are the top 10 worst of the worst.

The criteria for the list is the same as last year: any song is eligible, as long as it was released in and/or charted in 2024. So, for example, The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived by Taylor Swift could be on here since it was released 2024, even though it didn't chart on Hits 1. But I'm not gonna include some random song from 2021, like, say, All Too Well (10 Minute Version) (Taylor's Version) (From the Vault) (Sad Girl Autumn Version) (Recorded At Long Pond Studios). Sorry to all my ATWTMVTVFTVSGAVRALPS stans.

Also, as always, even if you're tired of seeing it at the top of people's rankings because it's just implied at this point... T H I S   I S   M Y   O P I N I O N. So, I hope I don't wake up tomorrow with more hate comments than the number of people in the world complaining about how I "hate rap" or "hate fun" or am "not a respected member of society" or whatever. Okay, now the top 10.

#10: Kesha - Joyride

If there's two genres of lyricism you all know I hate, it's overly sexual lyrics, and lyrics that repeat themselves over and over and over and over and over and over and over. This song is both. "I'm just looking for a JOY! RIDE! JOYRIDE! I'm just looking for a GOOD! TIME! TONIGHT!" Whatever that vocal effect is when she's singing those high notes is really grating for some reason. I guess the production sounds okay, for maybe five seconds. But this song gets annoying very quickly.

#9: Mark Ambor - Belong Together

This song is just very poorly written. I'm trying to imagine Mark writing this in the studio. "You... and... me... belong together. Like... hmmm, what rhymes with together? Ooh! I know! Like cold iced tea and warm weather!" Yeah, no. Also, ehrm, it should be "you and I belong together", not "you and me". He must have had Lady Gaga as his English teacher in school...

#8: Tommy Richman - Million Dollar Baby

He just has to make it really clear that he's rich. I don't like to hate on songs just because the singer doesn't sound very good, but like... this guy can't sing. He doesn't even sound like he's trying to sing. He sounds like he's squealing. And the production is not helping that. It sounds like he bought the cheapest piano keyboard he could find and played random chords over a preset beat called "Funk City 03".

#7: Ariana Grande & Mariah Carey - Yes, And?

*sigh* Unfortunately, a list of the worst songs of the year is almost always going to have at least one song that happens to be written by one of my favorite artists. Ariana has two appearances on my "best songs of the year" list, but this song... this was just not a good comeback for an artist as amazing as Ari. The original Yes, And wouldn't have made this list. It's still bad, but the remix with Mariah Carey that sounds like she's an AI screaming alien noises from another room is way worse. See my Eternal Sunshine album review for a review of the original song.

#6: Camila Cabello & Playboi Carti - I Luv It

Camila Cabello's albums Camila and Romance are two of my favorite albums of all time. C, XOXO, however, is not. Camila Cabello did something with this album that I had always been worried she'd do: drastically changing her sound and aesthetic just to fit with the trends. This is by far the worst song on that album. If you want to see why I think that, once again I'm gonna direct you to when I originally reviewed C, XOXO.

#5: Charli XCX - Von Dutch

I think you all knew Charli would show up at some point on here. She's not terrible by any means. She definitely has talent, and she's released some great music. But the lead single for Brat REALLY should've been Talk Talk and not this. I've already talked about this and the next two songs in my album review for Brat, so you can look at that if you want longer, more in-depth reviews of them.

#4: Charli XCX - 365

Once again, see the album review above if you want a full review. This song is essentially just a worse version of 360.

#3: Charli XCX - B2B

See the album review again for a longer review. This song is one of the most repetitive and annoying songs I've heard this year.

#2: Charli XCX & Billie Eilish - Guess

This song was only on the deluxe edition of Brat so it was not included in my album review, so I'll review it right now. This song's whole concept is just "You wanna guess the color of my underwear?" and doing a bunch of things with underwear. Really weird, really stupid concept for a song. I do not need to hear about your underwear every day on the radio. This is far worse than any of the songs on the standard edition of Brat, so at least I'm glad it's not on the regular album.

#1: Megan Thee Stallion & Yuki Chiba - Mamushi

Okay, time for a rant. Every Megan Thee Stallion song sounds the same. It's got some generic boring beat that never evolves, and the lyrics are just the same words over and over and over. I know some people like that kind of stuff, but if we're judging music as a pure art, Megan Thee Stallion's insanely repetitive music just doesn't work. "I get money I'm a stahhhhh stahhhhh stahhhhh stahhhhh stahhhhh stahhhhh stahhhhh". Why do people like these kinds of songs? I will never understand how Megan is so popular. And it's not like Yuki Chiba is much better. He's trying to rap, but he sounds monotonous and off-beat. The lyrics in his verse aren't great either - the sudden "nice to meet you" and "I'm so happy" thrown in the middle of the Japanese lyrics (which I have translated before, and are not that good) just sound so random and awkwardly placed. Unlike some of the other bloggers, the language the lyrics are in wouldn't really affect my opinion on the song itself, but I just would've preferred if those last few lines were entirely cut out. But even then, it wouldn't be a much better song, because literally nothing about this works. As you may remember, my least favorite song of 2023 was Labrinth & Billie Eilish's Never Felt So Alone. But Mamushi is MILES worse than that song. Never Felt So Alone at least has some redeeming qualities - the production changes in a few sections, and the pre-chorus melody is alright I suppose. I would go so far as to say Never Felt So Alone grew on me a decent bit. For Mamushi, I tried to think deeply and find a single redeemable quality about it, and all I could come up with is that... I mean, I guess Megan doesn't sound terrible, and she's mostly rapping on the beat? But her flow still falls flat, so that's far from a saving quality of the song. So, Megan Thee Stallion does not deserve 1% of the recognition she gets as a musician. Mamushi isn't even my least favorite Megan song. I still think Wap, Body, and maybe even Savage are worse than this. But this is quite close. I tried to think of any "good" songs she had, and I thought of three, but all three of them are just songs where she's featured with another artist so they hardly count as proper Megan songs: Not My Fault with Renee Rapp, Beautiful Mistakes with Maroon 5, and the 34+35 remix with Ariana Grande and Doja Cat. And even on those, Megan's verses are my least favorite parts of all of those songs. Her verse in Beautiful Mistakes is probably the closest thing she has to a good part on a song, maybe because she actually sings a bit, and some of the lyrics are kinda clever, but even then it's still pretty meh. But Megan has a lot of songs, so three semi-decent features she has on other songs isn't gonna affect my opinion: Megan just doesn't deserve to be a popular singer, and Mamushi is a glaring example of her lack of interesting and enjoyable music.

Whew... okay. That was something. I'm glad to be back.

"But Hallett, what about the album reviews you promised us before you disappeared for one trillion years?"

Starting in 2025, you'll get one album review every week, along with maybe some other random post.

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

{5,000 Views Special} Welcome to the Eras Tour (Hallett's Version)

Hi! So, this is what I decided on to celebrate reaching 5,000 pageviews. I created my own version of the Eras Tour, if I was in charge of the setlist. This is entirely based on my personal opinions, and on two specific factors: what songs I like the best, and what songs I feel would be the best songs to perform at a major concert like this. So, there are some songs that I really like, but are excluded as they might not be the best choices for a huge concert event like this, e.g. Ronan, Bigger than the Whole Sky, Soon You'll Get Better, Forever Winter, Epiphany, etc. 

(Also, just for your information, I've never been to an actual Eras Tour show, but I've heard a lot about it and seen the movie and some videos from the tour.)

Anyway, without further ado, this is the setlist for the Eras Tour (Hallett's Version)!

Lover era

1. Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince - A perfect choice for an opener song, and I wouldn't change a thing about this performance.

2. Death by a Thousand Cuts - Underrated song that would've been a great performance for the main show.

3. The Archer - I love that she already included this song, as I wouldn't have expected that. I love this song and her performance was wonderful.

4. Lover - Could represent finding new love after the sadder themes expressed in the previous two songs?

5. Cruel Summer - I don't love this song as much as some people do, but including it is an obvious choice. Also, it's track 5 of the concert.

6. You Need to Calm Down - The performance of this one was wonderful, and the "let me see your hands" part was iconic. I feel like this one makes for a good closer to the Lover section.

Fearless era

7. The Way I Loved You - One of those songs I love more than I feel like I should.

8. You Belong With Me - Absolutely iconic song, and I feel like so much could have been done with the performance especially considering it's also one of her most iconic music videos.

9. The Other Side of the Door - I could go on for hours about how much I love this song. It's one of my favorite songs of Taylor's whole discography, I don't know how it's not more popular.

Red era

10. State of Grace - A Red non-single and album opener that should have been the era opener. "Love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right" is basically the line that represents the whole album.

11. 22 - Notice how I placed this as song number 11 of the tour, and song number 2 of the Red era, and 11 times 2 is 22? I guess this would just be an interesting Easter egg for anyone who's a fan of both Taylor Swift and math...

12. Red - I referenced this song in my Midnights album review, and my opinion still stands: it's a banger song that I admittedly like a bit more than I should.

13. All Too Well (10 Minute Version) - My favorite (and seemingly most people's favorite) Taylor Swift song, for very obvious reasons. This should definitely be song number 13.

Speak Now era

14. Long Live - A great song dedicated to all the fans and her band, a must-play on the Eras Tour.

15. Enchanted - For a lot of the tour, this was somehow the only song she played for the Speak Now era. There was just a little period of time where she also did Long Live. Sure, it's a frequently forgotten album with not too many huge "iconic" hit songs, and this one is still one of my favorites so it should stay, just the album deserved better treatment. But as for this song itself, I think it's one of my top 5 favorite Taylor Swift songs.

16. Sparks Fly - A Speak Now fan favorite that I also really love.

17. Mine - I feel like this is the biggest hit from the album, and it's easily my favorite of the three songs on the album with four-letter titles.

18. Timeless - A criminally underrated vault track and one of my top 13 favorites of Taylor's discography, and I would love to hear a live performance of this on the Eras set. It may not be an era-defining song or whatever, but it just needed to be on the set.

Reputation era

19. ...Ready for It? - Well, obviously keep this as the opener.

20. Gorgeous - This song is really cute and underrated.

21. New Year's Day - I wanted the Rep era to be kinda short, but I feel like this one would be a good closer for this era, as it's also the album closer.

Folklore era

22. The 1 - Song 22 of the set is another song that says a number in the title.

23. The Last Great American Dynasty - Probably the most "upbeat" song from the Folklore album, so I think this would be a good inclusion for the concert. The performance already looked amazing with the train and the Folklore house, and I wouldn't change much about that.

24. Invisible String - Another happier song from Folklore that was previously removed from the setlist and replaced with The 1.

25. Mirrorball - I've always considered this the best song from Folklore.

26. Cardigan - Easily keep this as the closer for the Folklore set, as it's the biggest hit by far.

Evermore era

27. Marjorie - Yes, I intentionally decided to split the Folklore and Evermore sets into two separate eras again, as they're often seen as similar, but to me they're still two very distinct albums. This song is beautiful and I'm beyond surprised that she originally included it but love that she did.

28. Willow - The iconic Evermore song, and a very special one for me. The performance on the Eras Tour was perfect.

29. Long Story Short - An upbeat, relatively happy song for a good concert performance. I'm kind of surprised this one wasn't already included.

30. Champagne Problems - This is one of my favorite songs from Evermore and definitely a fan favorite, so I'm glad she included it and it's so cool that she did an acoustic performance of it on the piano from the Cardigan music video.

31. Tolerate It - Another song I was shocked to see is on the actual setlist, and it should totally stay. The cinematic-style performance at the dinner table was really cool to me.

32. Closure - Why do people hate this song again? I love it so much, and in a way it could kind of work well almost as a mashup with Tolerate It as they are both in a 5/4 time signature and the same key. Also, it would be insane if they performed the percussion live on actual pots and pans.

1989 era

33. Out of the Woods - I'm surprised this wasn't on the set. A huge, dramatic live performance of this would be iconic.

34. Blank Space - This is one of those songs that just can't not be included.

35. Shake it Off - Same deal as Blank Space.

36. Wildest Dreams - I don't know why but I've always felt like this should be the closer of the 1989 set. It just has that kind of vibe to it of saying goodbye but hoping to be remembered, which works well as a closer to a concert.

The Tortured Poets Department era

37. I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - When there's a song literally about the Eras Tour, obviously it needs to be on here.

38. Fortnight - The lead single that everyone knows, so it also kinda had to be on the set.

39. So High School - A full version of this song on the Eras Tour would be great.

40. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - My favorite song from TTPD, and I love how dramatic the performance already looks.

41. The Manuscript - It would be crazy if she actually played this one on the tour, but if she did it would be the TTPD closer.

Midnights era

42. Maroon - Both shades of Red that Taylor has written songs about needed to be on the set.

43. Midnight Rain - One of Taylor's most over-hated songs that should definitely be kept on here.

44. Anti-Hero - The best single from Midnights and the performance with the music video worked shockingly well on the original concert.

45. Karma - Like she apparently already does, Ice Spice can make surprise appearances sometimes.

46. Bejeweled - This song is essentially a more mature version of Shake It Off, and the dance performances were crazy, so why wasn't this the tour closer instead of Karma?

Well, that's The Eras Tour (Hallett's Version). Since I'm planning on having weekly album reviews on this blog, I don't think I'll do any more album reviews for pageview specials, but I'll do more unique posts like this. Thanks again for 5,000 views!

(I'm really late on it but trust me there's an album review coming this week. Hopefully I'll consistently get them out on Wednesdays or Thursdays each week but don't quote me on that.)

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

This week was incredibly terribly greatly awfully amazingly badly weird - Hits 1 9/28/24

Hi! So, I've made a big decision about what I'm gonna do with my blog. In addition to countdown reviews, I decided to continue my album reviews because there are so many interesting albums being released and they're so fun to make. So instead of just doing little series of them every time I hit a milestone number of views, you can expect an album review about once a week, if possible. That's definitely subject to change depending on whether my life gets insanely busy again, but there will certainly be an album review this week, most likely by Wednesday or Thursday. As for this week's countdown, just like last week, it was a combination of really good and really bad stuff. We got rid of a bunch of old songs and had some amazing debuts, but one re-entry of a song that's guaranteed a spot on my worst songs list of 2024, maybe even #1. There were also a crap ton of weird movements that made zero sense and a lot of them did not need to happen. So let's get into it!

Exits:

Benson Boone - Slow It Down

Madison Beer - Make You Mine

Shawn Mendes - Why Why Why

Teddy Swims - The Door

Countdown:

#30: Megan Thee Stallion & Yuki Chiba - Mamushi (Re-entry) (oh please...)

#29: Addison Rae - Diet Pepsi (=)

#28: Kendrick Lamar - Not Like Us (Debut)

#27: Meghan Trainor - Criminals (Debut)

#26: Linkin Park - The Emptiness Machine (Debut)

#25: Katseye - Touch (+2)

#24: The Weeknd - Dancing in the Flames (+6)

#23: Tate McRae - It's Ok I'm Ok (=)

#22: Khalid - Heatstroke (+4)

#21: MGK & Jelly Roll - Lonely Road (+7)

#20: Halsey - Ego (+5)

#19: Coldplay, Little Simz, Elyanna, Tini & Burna Boy - We Pray (+5)

#18: Charli XCX - Apple (-5)

#17: Benson Boone - Pretty Slowly (+5)

#16: Bruno Mars & Lady Gaga - Die With a Smile (+1)

Extra: Dasha - Bye Bye Bye

#15: Alex Warren - Carry You Home (+1)

#14: Gracie Abrams - Close to You (-5)

#13: Mark Ambor - Belong Together (-3)

#12: Charli XCX - 360 (+9)

#11: Myles Smith - Stargazing (+1)

#10: Sabrina Carpenter - Taste (+1)

#9: Marshmello & Kane Brown - Miles on It (+9)

#8: Dasha - Austin (+7)

#7: Chappell Roan - Hot to Go (=)

#6: Taylor Swift - I Can Do It With A Broken Heart (=)

#5: Billie Eilish - Birds of a Feather (-1)

#4: Shaboozey - A Bar Song (Tipsy) (=)

#3: Sabrina Carpenter - Please Please Please (=)

#2: Post Malone & Morgan Wallen - I Had Some Help (=)

Last year's #1: Taylor Swift - Cruel Summer

#1: Chappell Roan - Good Luck Babe! (=)

Debuts:

We did not need MaTRASHi to re-enter. I swear, every Megan Thee Stallion song is exactly the same, and it does not work. This better leave next week and then never come back after that.

Luckily we have a debut this week by a different and much better Meghan. Meghan Trainor's Criminals debuts the countdown this week after two weeks in Hitbound. This is great. The lyrics are hilarious - it's about how the intense amount of love she feels should be illegal, so she and her partner are criminals. And it's got her signature production style that sounds amazing here. I hope this does well, but judging by how poorly Mother, Been Like This & Whoops had previously performed on the countdown, I doubt this'll do much.

So, I don't think I've told you this before, but I actually hadn't listened to Kendrick Lamar's Not Like Us until about two months ago. I've very rarely brought myself to listen to rap music outside of Hits 1 as it doesn't interest me much, but I knew if I went too long without listening to this particular song, people would think I live under a rock. I like this. It's got really clever and kinda funny lyrics, including the line that's apparently going viral, "Tryna strike a chord and it's probably a minor". Obviously I love when songs have musical humor because I'm the biggest music nerd on the planet. So this is pretty good.

And finally, we have Linkin Park finally having one of their newly released songs make the countdown, The Emptiness Machine. This is probably my favorite debut this week. The rock production is fantastic, the lyrics are great, and I quite like the new lead singer.

Biggest Jump: Marshmello & Kane Brown - Miles On It, Charli XCX - 360 (+9)

Biggest Drop: Gracie Abrams - Close to You, Charli XCX - Apple (-5)

Missed song: Halsey - Colors

Recommendations for Hits 1: Chappell Roan - Casual, Pearl Jam - Scared of Fear, Charli XCX & Troye Sivan - Talk Talk, Demi Lovato - You'll Be Ok, Kid

Hitbound:

Myles Smith - Wait for You

Kylie Minogue - Lights Camera Action (Debut)

Knox - Invisible

Jon Bellion - Kid Again (Debut)

Camila Cabello - Godspeed

Morgan Wallen & Ernest - Cowgirls (Debut)

Henry Moodie - Good Old Days (Debut)

Damiano David & Labrinth - Silverlines (Debut)

Ava Max - Spot a Fake

Alex Warren - Catch My Breath (Debut)

Teddy Swims - Bad Dreams

Natalie Jane - Somebody to Someone

Balu Brigada - So Cold (Debut)

Nightly - Every Part (Debut)

Dasha - Bye Bye Bye

Alex Warren - Burning Down

8 debuts... okay then. First up is Kylie Minogue, a year after one of my favorite EDM songs of 2023 (not exactly saying much but a great song nonetheless) Padam Padam. Lights Camera Action isn't near as great but I like it. It's moderately forgettable but the production sounds pretty good. The lyrics aren't so amazing as they feel a bit generic but it's fine. This'll probably perform about as well as Padam Padam and I'm fine with that.

This next song is by Morgan Wallen and someone named Ernest with this song Cowgirls, which is apparently from almost two years ago but it's getting a sudden resurgence for whatever weird pop radio reason. This is just more generic boring Morgan Wallen. I really don't get why he's popular, not just because of all the controversies, but his music is also insanely boring.

Henry Moodie returns with Good Old Days. Unfortunately, none of his later songs have quite matched up to the same level of greatness as Drunk Text, one of my favorite songs of the year. This suffers from the same problem as RPWT where it just feels too generic and forgettable for me to enjoy it as much as some of his other songs.

Damiano David & Labrinth collab on Silverlines. Am I the only person in the universe who doesn't hate this song? (Of course, that's true of a lot of songs for me, but whatever) It sounds so cool to me and it's not boring at all, it evolves in an amazing way. So much better than Never Felt So Alone.

Hits 1 has now picked up on five Alex Warren songs in half a year, three of which have been in the past month. It's official, he's becoming the new Hayes Warner/Jessie Murph/Havana Winter/Knox/Henry Moodie/Presley Regier. Catch My Breath is a very mediocre and forgettable song that sounds like every other song he's released.

Balu Brigada is here with So Cold, and this is yet another song that I can't remember one second of after it's over. But I guess it's not bad, just a bit forgettable, like almost every other song on here.

Nightly returns after one year, this time bringing us Every Part. I don't love this as much as Shirt, which grew on me a lot after dropping out of Hitbound, but I like this a decent bit. The lyrics are really well-written as they're about loving someone who's going through mental issues and wanting to help them. Of course, the pre-chorus does rhyme "head" with "bed", but that doesn't take away from the song that much in this case.

Dropouts:

Tinashe - Nasty

Katy Perry & Doechii - I'm His He's Mine

Haiden Henderson - Sweat

Henry Moodie - Right Person Wrong Time

Jimin - Who

Fifty Fifty - SOS

These won't be missed. I'm His He's Mine and Who are in the abyss though so it's possible they might debut the countdown after some time.

The Blurbiness Machine:

We said goodbye to Slow It Down, Make You Mine, The Door, and Why Why Why. I'm fine with all of those leaving, especially the first three. My prediction was correct: Slow It Down, Make You Mine, and The Door had pretty much zero chance at making it into October.

No idea what Hits 1 will do with Touch, but I hope it keeps jumping, even if it only peaks at like #22 or something.

Great to see Lonely Road and Ego climbing. Now let's see them each jump 19 spots to #2 and #1 next week.

Charli XCX had both this week's biggest drop and biggest jump. Unfortunately, the significantly better song is the one that dropped, and the significantly worse song is the one that jumped. I thought for sure 360 was on its way out two weeks ago, but right now it's seeming like Apple might even leave first.

I really hope Close to You makes a comeback and doesn't leave from #14 next week.

I Can Do It With A Broken Heart is now on its 22nd week on the countdown! It's feeling twenty twoooo...

After falling last week, Miles On It and Austin both made big rebounds into the top 10. Miles On It is fading on me, and Austin is likely to fade on me if it lasts too much longer, but I'm still okay with this. Also, if Austin stays on for a mere three more weeks it will join the small club of songs that have lasted 30+ weeks on the countdown after it was shortened to top 30.

Good Luck Babe holds the top spot for a second week. That's pretty good for right now. It would be cool to see Please Please Please reclaim #1 for a second nonconsecutive week, and even better if Ego eventually hits #1, both of which are unlikely but possible, because Hits 1 is unpredictable. For now I'm perfectly fine with GLB at the top.

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

Finally back to doing this again... again... again - Hits 1 9/21/24

Hi! So, after my big album review series, I got sort of burnt out for a while, but I'm back to doing Hits 1 reviews, and hopefully it stays fairly consistent now. This week was kinda good and kinda not. One of my favorite songs on the countdown had the biggest drop, and another one of my favorite songs on the countdown fell off the #1 position. But that #1 was replaced by an almost equally good song, there were some great debuts, and most importantly we got rid of one old song and three contenders for my worst list of 2024 (which might have to be a bit longer than the 2023 one was because there have been so many horrible songs this year). So let's get into it!

Exits:

Ariana Grande - The Boy is Mine

Kesha - Joyride

Charli XCX & Billie Eilish - Guess

Megan Thee Stallion & Yuki Chiba - Mamushi

Countdown:

#30: The Weeknd - Dancing In The Flames (Debut)

#29: Addison Rae - Diet Pepsi (Debut)

#28: MGK & Jelly Roll - Lonely Road (-9)

#27: Katseye - Touch (Debut)

#26: Khalid - Heatstroke (-3)

#25: Halsey - Ego (+5)

#24: Coldplay, Little Simz, Burna Boy, Elyanna & Tini - We Pray (+3)

#23: Tate McRae - It's Ok I'm Ok (Debut)

#22: Benson Boone - Pretty Slowly (+6)

#21: Charli XCX - 360 (+1)

#20: Shawn Mendes - Why Why Why (+5)

#19: Madison Beer - Make You Mine (-2)

#18: Marshmello & Kane Brown - Miles On It (-8)

#17: Lady Gaga & Bruno Mars - Die With a Smile (+1)

#16: Alex Warren - Carry You Home (+5)

Extra: Katy Perry & Doechii - I'm His He's Mine

#15: Dasha - Austin (-7)

#14: Benson Boone - Slow it Down (=)

#13: Charli XCX - Apple (+2)

#12: Myles Smith - Stargazing (+4)

#11: Sabrina Carpenter - Taste (+2)

#10: Mark Ambor - Belong Together (+2)

#9: Gracie Abrams - Close to You (=)

#8: Teddy Swims - The Door (-2)

#7: Chappell Roan - Hot to Go (+4)

#6: Taylor Swift - I Can Do It With a Broken Heart (+1)

#5: Shaboozey - A Bar Song (-1)

#4: Billie Eilish - Birds of a Feather (-1)

#3: Sabrina Carpenter - Please Please Please (-2)

#2: Post Malone & Morgan Wallen - I Had Some Help (=)

Last year's #1: Taylor Swift - Cruel Summer

#1: Chappell Roan - Good Luck Babe! (+4)

Debuts:

The Weeknd is back with Dancing In The Flames. This is pretty good. I like the lyrics and the synth-pop production but I guess it's just a bit generic and forgettable. I don't mind if this one does well.

Tate McRae is back again with It's Ok I'm Ok. This is just very generic Tate. I don't love it, but it's still pretty good. I like the lyrics, sung to an ex's new girlfriend and assuring her that she's been in a similar situation, which somewhat reminds me of Hayes Warner's Predator. But it's very repetitive and doesn't feel like it does much different from her other songs production-wise. Still decent song.

We have two artists getting their first song ever on the Hits 1 countdown this week. Addison Rae makes her countdown debut with Diet Pepsi. I like this song WAY better than that annoying song she had four years ago, Obsessed. This song has really cool R&B production that kind of reminds me of Ariana Grande. The only reason it's not green is because I agree that the key change down a half step at the end is random and unnecessary and doesn't add anything to the song whatsoever.

Now the best for last. Katseye gets their first song on Hits 1, Touch. This is actually great, and much better than their previous Hitbound dropout, Debut. The production here has some really cool unique elements to it and some of it sounds almost jazz-like. The lyrics are also super relatable, about missing a chance for love because of lost communication. Even the repetitive chorus lines are done pretty well here. Honestly, I considered making this light purple, but I try to limit it to one dark purple and two light purples each week, and I still slightly prefer Please Please Please, Lonely Road, and Ego. But it's pretty close to dark purple.

Biggest Jump: Benson Boone - Pretty Slowly (+6)

Biggest Drop: MGK & Jelly Roll - Lonely Road (-9)

Missed song: Sabrina Carpenter - Skin

Recommendations for Hits 1: Sabrina Carpenter - Slim Pickins, Charli XCX - Talk Talk, Pearl Jam - Upper Hand, Chappell Roan - Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl, Camila Cabello - B.O.A.T.

Hitbound:

Dasha - Bye Bye Bye

Alex Warren - Burning Down (Debut)

Tinashe - Nasty

Ava Max - Spot a Fake (Debut)

Fifty Fifty - SOS (Debut)

Linkin Park - The Emptiness Machine

Katy Perry & Doechii - I'm His He's Mine

Meghan Trainor - Criminals

Henry Moodie - Right Person, Wrong Time

Haiden Henderson - Sweat (Debut)

Myles Smith - Wait For You

Jimin - Who

Knox - Invisible

Teddy Swims - Bad Dreams

Camila Cabello - Godspeed

Natalie Jane - Somebody to Someone

This week's Hitbound had a special guest host: Nonsentient Air Molecules. They were very entertaining. I especially loved when they said "__________". That was a really interesting thing to hear.

Alex Warren brings us yet another new song, Burning Down. This isn't great. It's a bit overproduced and the lyrics aren't that well-written either.

Ava Max returns with Spot a Fake. This is sorta generic but sounds alright, and I like the lyrics. It's not the most interesting thing out there but it's pretty good.

Fifty Fifty returns with a new lineup. Their song SOS is pretty good but sounds a bit too similar to Cupid for me to enjoy as much as I should.

Finally, Haiden Henderson brings us another countdown song, Sweat. This is better than HOAGT but still a very generic forgettable song that I couldn't remember one second of if you asked me.

Dropouts:

Mike Posner - Beautiful Day

Alex Warren - Troubled Waters

I'm fine with these leaving, neither one was that great.

You've been so out of blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs, thought about you way too blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs, over overthinking blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs blurbs, but you've been so out of blurbs, you could've had my blurbs, but you've been so out of blurbs:

The Boy Is Mine, Joyride, Guess, and Mamushi departed the countdown this week. The Boy Is Mine was the "best" of those four but it was still about time that left or else it would've gotten super annoying. But good riddance to those other three. Joyride, Guess, and Mamushi are all terrible songs that have been guaranteed a spot on my worst songs list for this year, so hopefully none of them re-enter.

Noooooo not Lonely Road having the biggest drop! I hope this song's run isn't over yet, and it rebounds next week.

It's great to see that Ego, my new dark purple song on the countdown, is climbing a bit. Now let's see this jump 24 spots to #1 next week.

With Joyride, Guess, and Mamushi all leaving, 360 goes back to orange status, and Belong Together & I Had Some Help become the new light oranges this week.

Why are Make You Mine & Slow It Down still here after almost half a year? These songs first debuted on Hits 1 back when Dua Lipa's Houdini was still #1. I keep forgetting that they haven't left yet, and on top of that, Slow It Down is somehow still in the top 15, and Make You Mine is hovering right outside of the top 15. I doubt either one of those songs will make it into October, but Hits 1 is Hits 1 so we'll see what they do with them.

Well, Please Please Please unfortunately only lasted one week at #1. I wish it got a bit of a longer time at #1. However, if, say I Had Some Help reclaimed #1, I would've been much more upset. There would definitely be a rant. In this case, the replacement at #1 was almost as good, Good Luck Babe. It's great to see Chappell Roan getting her first Hits 1 #1 song, and I'm not surprised it was Good Luck Babe. I could definitely see Hot to Go hitting #1 within the next few weeks and I wouldn't mind if that happened.

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

Nope, it's not quite over yet: here's a SHORT bonus album review for one of the SWEETEST albums of the year

Hi! Thanks again for the views. So, after I finished my 5-album series, I wanted to share one more album review with you. I had been teasing it for a long time, and after 132,947,323,589 years, it's finally here. You all know what it is. It's Short N Sweet by Sabrina Carpenter, aka one of the best albums of the year. It's also my 13th album review, so I was thinking I would do a Taylor Swift album, but the 5,000 pageviews special I'm planning soon is Taylor Swift-related, and this album is just too great not to share my review of. So, let's get into it!

1. Taste

My rating: 5/5 Great

This is the third single from the album, and it's a great album opener. First of all, let's talk about this production. One of the biggest things I love about this album is that it does a wonderful job of blending genres, and a bit of country influence runs through many of the tracks. This song introduces the overall musical style of the album which I quite like. And the lyrics are interesting. It's about her recent breakup with Shawn Mendes and how he got back together with Camila. But it's not being sung to Shawn, rather to Camila, warning her that the things they do together had already been done with Sabrina (which immediately reminded me of Olivia Rodrigo's Deja Vu, which I still prefer, but this song doesn't feel like a direct ripoff or anything). Essentially, she's saying that when Camila and Shawn kiss, she's gonna "taste" where Sabrina had been before. It's a weird song, but usually I like weird songs.

2. Please Please Please

My rating: 5/5 Great

We all know this one. It was her first #1 on Billboard charts and a recent #1 song on the Hits 1 Weekend Countdown. Usually I'm not the type of person who thinks of major radio hits as being even close to any artist's best songs (maybe because I love sad songs and acoustic ballads and that kind of thing, which typically don't perform well on radio), but so far the only real exceptions I've found have been Good 4 U & Vampire by Olivia Rodrigo, Everything I Wanted, Happier than Ever & My Future by Billie Eilish, Willow by Taylor Swift, and this song. This takes the genre-blending idea to an incredible degree, combining 70s-esque synths and beats, country-inspired vocal harmonies and acoustic guitars, and a fantastic key change in the second verse. So that's primarily why I love this song, but the lyrics are also well-written. I think it's kinda funny that Hits 1's clean version says "mothertrucker". But that's besides the point. It's just a great song.

3. Good Graces

My rating: 5/5 Great

Alright, we've reached the first non-single of the album. And I quite like this one. Lyrically, it reminds me of Please Please Please in that it's about the consequences of her boyfriend doing something stupid in a relationship, with this one being even more direct about its message. While it may not be quite as great as Please Please Please, it's still a very strong song. The production is pretty cool-sounding as well. It's got kind of an electronic beat, which isn't used a lot throughout this album, so it definitely sounds very different from many of the other songs on here. So, it's a great song.

4. Sharpest Tool

My rating: 5/5 Great

Another great song! I love the lyrics here, as they're very relatable. It's about reflecting on a breakup when you knew the entire time that the person you were with wasn't the "sharpest tool in the shed" and moving on quickly from the relationship. It's got a unique structure to it also, which I quite like. And the production sounds very different from other songs on here. It feels almost R&B to me which was interesting to hear on this album. So, pretty great song. Not much else to say here.

5. Coincidence

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, like I said earlier, Sabrina took somewhat of a country route with some of the songs on this album. This is probably the most country-inspired songs on here, with the acoustic guitar production and vocal harmonies. I love how everything sounds here. The lyrics are perfectly written as well. It's another song about Shawn and Camila, and although this song may seem more stripped-down, Sabrina's signature unhinged humor shines here. ("Your car drove itself from LA to your thighs!") So this is one of my favorite songs on the album I think.

6. Bed Chem

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Well, we've reached our first less-than-great song on here. It's my "least favorite" on the album, but it's still tolerable at least. As you may know, I'm not a huge fan of songs that are this sexually explicit. It's one of those weird R&B songs that just somehow sounds like a sexual song, and it's really boring to me. There is literally nothing interesting about this song other than being very sexual. But I guess it's not particularly bad. It's just a bit weird. So, moving on.

7. Espresso

My rating: 4/5 Good

This song needs no introduction. The song of the summer of 2024. The lead single and biggest hit off the album, and like many biggest hits and lead singles, it's not great. But it's still good. The 80s-style synthy R&B production sounds alright, but it doesn't evolve much, and at times it kind of sounds like a song from a Starbucks commercial if that makes sense. I do think the lyrics are really clever though. When I first saw the title, I didn't know what to think of it, but in this song she's comparing herself to the coffee, keeping her partner up at night. So, decent song but nothing too special in the context of the whole album.

8. Dumb & Poetic

My rating: 5/5 Great

W O W. I was not expecting this album to have a deeply meaningful breakup ballad, but surprise surprise, it does, and unsurprise unsurprise, it's my favorite song on the album. If I had to describe these lyrics in three words, it would be "Short N Sour", because it's the shortest song on the album, and I'm pretty sure it's about Joshua Bassett. The lyrics are just packed with genius (this song shows that Sabrina is Smart & Poetic), including a Leonard Cohen name-drop, a clever reference to Joshua Bassett by mentioning cherries in the first verse, a common theme throughout Joshua's lyrics, and just line-after-line, unhinged but in the best possible way. And the production is wonderful. Typically short songs don't feel like they evolve enough for me to love them that much, but this has that emotional buildup throughout that sounds amazing. So, I think it's safe to say this is the best song on the album. Since this is basically like Sabrina Carpenter's The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived, I was almost tempted to give this a 6, but I'm reserving that for songs that are just extra special to me. But it's still my favorite song on the album, and my favorite Sabrina song, no contest.

9. Slim Pickins

My rating: 5/5 Great

Alright, it's gonna be pretty hard to top Dumb & Poetic, but this song is still great. It's another one about a very relatable concept - desperately trying to find the person of your dreams, but that person being rare to find. The lyrics are pretty funny, with clever lines like "A boy who's nice that breathes", "The good ones are deceased or taken", and especially that outro, "Since the good ones call their exes wasted, and since the Lord forgot my gay awakening, then I'll just be here in the kitchen serving up some moaning and bitching." I also love the production, which also has a kind of pop-country sound to it. So, it's another favorite on the album.

10. Juno

My rating: 4/5 Good

*sigh* One thing I'm kind of known for as a blogger is that I generally don't love the songs that are most people's favorites. And this one's okay, but I think I don't love it as much as some of the other songs on here for the same reason as Bed Chem: it's just too sexually explicit for me to actually enjoy listening to it. I will say though, it is better than Bed Chem because the lyrics are more interesting and clever at times, and the production is significantly better than that of Bed Chem even though it does sound like a worse version of Feather. So, not the worst thing on the album, but still one of my "least favorites". I've heard some people say this would make a good fourth single from the album, but I actually highly doubt it'll be a single considering how sexual it is. More likely Good Graces or Slim Pickins would be the next single choices if anything.

11. Lie to Girls

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, the last two tracks are a bit "slower", and as you may know, I typically like "slower" songs more than this entire music blogging community combined. And of course I really like these two tracks. I think I like this one slightly more. I'm not entirely sure what it's about, but like many songs on the album, the lyrics are cleverly written, including the repeated refrain, "You don't have to lie to girls, if they like you they'll just lie to themselves", and I love the little interlude in the second verse when it says "We love to read the cold hard facts and swear they're incorrect, we love to mistake butterflies for cardiac arrest". And this has really cool production on top of it. It's got this synthy atmospheric sound to it but it evolves as it goes on. Clearly another on of my favorites on the album.

12. Don't Smile

My rating: 5/5 Great

Okay, we've reached the final track. I'm not gonna review the bonus tracks just because I'm trying to keep this review relatively short (and sweet), but you can see reviews of those on Bubby's blog. This is definitely a solid closing track. So, the premise of this song is a twist on the common phrase "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened." Here, she says, "don't smile because it happened, cry because it's over." It's essentially about regrets after a breakup, and it's possibly about Joshua Bassett. Also, this is probably unintentional because I couldn't find any further connections between the two songs, the second verse starts with the line "Pour my feelings into the microphone" which is somewhat of a parallel to the well-known opening line of Espresso's second verse "I'm working late cuz I'm a singer". Don't think that means anything here, but just interesting to mention. But anyway, I obviously love the lyrics here, and the production is similar to Lie to Girls but just as great. Wonderful closer.

Conclusion

Overall album rating: 93% (Great Album)

Interestingly this got the same score as when Bubby reviewed it. I will say though, considering how short albums like this have much less room for error than a lengthier album that can afford to have multiple mediocre or bad songs and still get a pretty good score, this album managed to perfectly live up to it's name and stay Short N Sweet throughout.

Favorite songs: Please Please Please, Coincidence, Slim Pickins, Dumb & Poetic

"Least" favorite songs: Bed Chem

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

{3,000 Views Special Pt.5} This album literally defined the summer of 2024... is it actually as terrible as I initially thought?

Hi! Thanks again for thousands of views even though I'm thousands of years late on these posts. So, I told you the albums I chose for this series would be completely unexpected and weird. Well, I bet even when I told you that, you wouldn't expect me to actually review this criminally overrated mess of an album in a million years, did you? If you haven't already guessed just by the color and font of the image above, it's... *sigh* Brat. By Charli XCX. Which is apparently already like one of the most iconic albums of the past decade or something, and it has one song that's literally about underwear. 

I was expecting to rant for millions of words about the current state of the music industry and the general public's flawed views on what kinds of music should become popular due to the apparent lack of quality in the lyrical writing and musical composition of a majority of the most popular music of the past couple of years completely overshadowing those who deserve public recognition for pure talent and effort, but I gave this album a few listens and... maybe it's not the worst thing ever? There's still plenty of characterless stuff here, but some songs were shockingly great. Contrary to what I was expecting, not every song is just a generic club dance song with substanceless lyrics and non-existent production quality. Some songs have some deep lyrics, cool-sounding production, and are actually quite good. But still most of the songs are kinda bad. (Also please keep in mind that I respect Charli as a person, I like her whole message and understand that she does great things... music just isn't always one of those for her, and as a mostly unbiased music reviewer, I separate music from personality.) Umm... let's just get into it.

1. 360

My rating: 1/5 Bad

So, this album has a lot of radio singles, and this seems to be the best-performing one. Unfortunately, it's just not a good song, and I don't know why it's currently top 15 on Hits 1. It's just one of those dumb cliche songs that's just bragging about everything and has nothing else to it. The production is insanely repetitive, and unlike some songs on here, it literally never changes or does anything that sounds remotely interesting. Obviously not a good opener track.

2. Club Classics

My rating: 1/5 Bad

So we have another bad song right at the start. This one is a mess. It's one of the most repetitive songs on the album, and that's saying something. This might just be the most generic club song on here, and half the lyrics are just "When I go to the club, I wanna hear those club classics" and a laundry list of artists and producers of club music she wants to dance to. This song was very close to being red, but at least she kinda sounds like she's singing and not just talking with autotune. She's doing a style of singing more similar to the Boom Clap chorus, which I think sounds better than her usual talking with autotune vocal style. But it's still a really bad song.

3. Sympathy is a Knife

My rating: 4/5 Good

Alright, now we've got one of the good songs on the album. A lyrical theme I was shocked to see appear on a lot of songs on here is displaying her inner vulnerability and insecurities despite seeming like just... well, a "brat". I love how this lyrical theme is explored. This song has some interesting production that actually has a nice melody to it, something Charli has been notoriously bad at in the past. It's not too repetitive and the autotune doesn't get in the way. So this is a pretty good song, and definitely not the only one on the album.

4. I Might Say Something Stupid

My rating: 5/5 Great

...wow. I was not expecting this. It's a heartfelt piano ballad about how she feels like she doesn't belong at parties when she's pressured to change herself. I am not even joking at all. Charli XCX made this. The existence of this song is what made me stop calling her Characterless XCX. She has so much character here. Sure, the autotune is somewhat distracting at times, and I would've liked it even better without it, but it's not like it completely ruins the song or anything. It's obviously still a great song that was definitely a great inclusion to an album like this.

5. Talk Talk

My rating: 5/5 Great

Wow, two great songs in a row. This one is just so relatable for me. It's about a crush on someone and just desperately waiting for them to talk to you, no matter what it is. The lyrics are repetitive but it works here, and it's perfectly written. The production sounds pretty cool here also. Unlike in IMSSS, the autotune is actually less heavy. Shockingly, I think I unironically like this song better than IMSSS. But they're pretty close. Overall this song is just a great addition to the album and I'm glad it's on here. Also, unlike the other great songs on the album, this would actually do quite well on pop radio, so I really wish it was released as a single. But unfortunately, now that Brat summer is over forever, it seems unlikely that we'll get another single.

6. Von Dutch

My rating: 0/5 Terrible

Well, the greatness was short-lived, and now we're in "hardly even a proper song" territory. Now obviously if there's one thing I'm kinda known for as a blogger other than my lack of a decently consistent posting schedule, it's that I'm known for never just throwing around great ratings to any song that's fun or cool or whatever like some people do, but I'm also not exactly known for throwing around terrible ratings to anything boring or annoying or whatever. But this song is just terrible. The production is just a loud overwhelming mess comparable to that of Guess, and the vocals are literally a one-note melody almost entirely throughout. The lyrics are also terrible. "It's obvious, I'm your number one, I'm your number one, I'm your number one..." like we get it, you're number one. This is easily one of the worst "songs" on the album.

7. Everything is Romantic

My rating: 2/5 Mediocre

So, this one starts off alright. It's got an interesting concept to it, the lyrics are pretty good, and the production is a bit empty but still decent-sounding. So, why is it "mediocre"? Well, it's the second longest song on the album... and the outro takes up about a third of that length... and what are the lyrics in said outro? "Fall in love again and again"... 36 times.  It's just too excessively repetitious for me to enjoy listening to it. But it's obviously not terrible. There are still plenty of redeeming qualities to it, but the length of the outro is what really takes me out of it as it feels like a complete waste of a relatively "long" song.

8. Rewind

My rating: 4/5 Good

This one's actually one of the better songs on here. I love the concept here, about wondering if she deserves her success and wishing she could go back to a simpler time in her life. The lyricism here is great. But production-wise, it feels kind of generic and forgettable. It definitely could have been better, but it's still a pretty good song. Not much to say here, just a pretty good song.

9. So I

My rating: 5/5 Great

Wow. This was unexpected. This one's really great. So, another thing I'm kinda known for as a blogger is that I love sad songs. This is easily the saddest song on the album. It's about a long-time collaborator Sophie who has worked with Charli on her music, who recently died. This song reflects on their relationship and her own wishes and regrets. Lyrically, this might be the album's strongest song. Obviously the main thing that makes me love this song is the lyrics, but the production also sounds wonderful. I was definitely not expecting a song as deeply meaningful as this. And THIS is the same album as Von Dutch?

10. Girl So Confusing

My rating: 3/5 Decent

This one's okay. I like the message here, but the lyrics are kind of repetitive and the verses aren't super well-written. Simple lyricism can work sometimes, but this song is just not doing much for me. The production is really bizarre also. The vocal effects are somewhat distracting. But obviously it's not a bad song, it's just mid. Could be better, could be worse. Not much to say for this one.

11. Apple

My rating: 4/5 Good

So, this is definitely my favorite of the radio singles off the album. It's not my favorite song on the album, but I love that this one is getting radio attention. Apparently this song is written about her relationship with her family. The lyrics are actually very clever, using the "apple" as a metaphor for the relationship and using phrases related to apples, such as "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree", "The apple could turn yellow or green", "I wanna grow the apple, keep all the seeds", among others. This song is actually very closely bordering on a "great" rating, but the only thing that keeps it from being better is the random mention of an "airport". I think it's kind of awkward and doesn't fit into the flow of the song, even though some people think it's clever wordplay. Overall, it's still a pretty good song.

12. B2B

My rating: 0/5 Terrible

Welp, this is the first bad song in a while on this album. My complaint about this one is literally the same as almost every other song on this album: it's just too repetitive. This might just be the most repetitive song on the whole album. And no, I don't mean that like there's a chorus that repeats a lot but it still has unique lyrics and somewhat of a proper structure. No, I'm serious, at least three fourths of the lyrics are "I don't wanna fall right back to us, maybe you should run right back to her" or "back, back, back, back, back". And there's really only one proper verse of unique lyrics thrown in the middle. And... that's it. So obviously this is one of the weakest songs on here.

13. Mean Girls

My rating: 1/5 Bad

Yeah, I'm not loving this one. The lyrics here are just not great. It's all about a stereotypical "mean girl", but I don't quite understand the whole message here. It's insanely repetitive, and the chorus rhymes heart with apart which I've said many times is a really dumb cliche. The production is also quite repetitive and doesn't do anything interesting. So, maybe not the worst song on the album but definitely not a very good song. Not much else to say for this one.

14. I Think About It All the Time

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Contrary to the title, this is not a song I think about all the time. It's very forgettable and kind of boring, and not the kind of thing I'll feel like listening to a lot. The lyrics are okay I guess? But not enough to make it any better. I literally don't have that much to say for this one, it's just kind of there. I'm indifferent on this one right now, but it might grow on me at some point. Alright, almost done.

15. 365

My rating: 0/5 Terrible

And the closing track is... possibly the worst song on the album. It's just a complete rehash of 360. The production is literally the same as 360 but in a different key and sped up, and the lyrics don't feel like they do anything different form 360. Now, albums with multiple songs based on each other aren't necessarily bad. Sometimes it can be quite good. Beyonce's Cowboy Carter is a great example of an album that does that kind of thing well. But here, it's just not good, because it doesn't feel like it brings enough new meaning to the track. And sure, some parts of the production here are different, but in most cases it's just worse than 360. So, this was definitely a weak closing track. But whatever, the album's over now...

Conclusion

Overall album rating: 49% (Mediocre Album)

So, it's certainly not a great album, but it's not completely terrible like I thought it'd be. It all just averages out to a medium score, with songs ranging from horrible to fantastic. I don't feel like reviewing all the bonus tracks like I did for Midnights, but if I did, Guess would definitely be the worst song on the album BY FAR. Not gonna lie, that song actually kinda makes me nauseous with the whole "underwear" concept, and it's such a horrible disappointment that Billie Eilish, aka one of my top 5 favorite music artists of all time, has been featured on one of the worst songs of the year two years in a row. But whatever, the main album is just kinda mid. I don't think it deserves all the recognition and critical acclaim it gets, but it's far from the worst album of the year.  (I don't plan on making a full-length review on it, but without even listening to the whole thing, I think the worst album of this year is Megan Thee Stallion's new album. Any album with a song where half the lines are "I get money I'm a star star star star star star star" is automatically terrible. But that's besides the point.)

Favorite songs: I Might Say Something Stupid, Talk Talk, So I

Least favorite songs: Von Dutch, B2B, 365

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

{3,000 Views Special Pt.4} This DARK album might have MATTERed a lot this year if it were released on any other day

                                                 

Hi! Wow, only one album left in my five-part 3,000 views special series after this... and then one bonus album review for the huge new album that comes out on Friday that I don't even need to say the title of because everybody already knows I'm doing it. So this album that I'm reviewing now is one that you probably had no idea I'd do an in-depth review of. And it might be because you didn't know it existed. It's an album called Dark Matter, by Pearl Jam. This album most likely would've been somewhat of a hit, if only it was released on literally any other day. For some reason, they decided to release this album on April 19, 2024... the same day as Taylor Swift's TTPD. I wanted to review this album since it's a slightly less popular album, and one that I hadn't listened to until recently because I was admittedly much more excited by TTPD, but also because it's a genre that I don't typically do album reviews of, so I thought this would be an interesting one to include in my pentalogy. Also, I just noticed that I'm already almost to 4,000 views (an obvious sign that I was really late getting these last two "3,000 Views Special" posts out). Obviously I won't do a 4,000 views special because that would be too soon and too much unnecessary work, but I already have a little something planned for 5,000 views... and it's gonna be Taylor Swift-related because apparently the crowd was chanting "more!" You'll see when I get to it. But anyway, let's get into this review.

1. Scared of Fear

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, unlike literally all three of the other albums I've reviewed for this 3,000 views series, this album starts with a very strong song. This is one of my favorite songs from the album. The lyrics are really well-written. The songwriting on this album is stronger than I expected, and a lot of it seems to be about the end of a long relationship, specifically when the other person is hurting themselves. I don't quite understand the title because it's never mentioned in the lyrics and doesn't seem to be directly connected to anything. But maybe there's just something about it I'm not getting. The production here sounds really cool, and it's got nice evolution as it goes along. I'm glad this is the album opener rather than any of these next three songs.

2. React, Respond

My rating: 4/5 Good

This one's okay, but I don't love it. So I get what the song is going for, but it just feels a bit weird to me. It's really repetitive, and the production sounds okay but it's honestly not too different from a lot of their other songs. The many... interesting ways Eddie sings the titular line also sound kinda weird, which seems to be a popular opinion about this song. Of course, a lot of these are pretty small things for me. I still like the concept of the lyrics here and it's got some good lyrics, but it's easily not one of the best songs on this album.

3. Wreckage

My rating: 3/5 Decent

This is probably my least favorite song on the album, but I guess it's still alright. I hardly ever complain about song lengths, and this album has some great long songs on it, but this one is five minutes long and that almost feels kinda forced. It's extremely repetitive, which is often not great for long songs like this. Production-wise, it starts out sounding pretty good but it doesn't evolve much at all. But it's not a bad song by any means. Most of the lyrics are still decently written and everything here sounds alright, this is just the type of song that would have been more effective if it was shorter.

4. Dark Matter

My rating: 4/5 Good

So, this seems to have been the lead single, but I can definitely think of songs that would have been much better choices. The production sounds cool, but I don't know what it is about it but it sounds just like some other song to me. There also seems to be some kind of weird vocal effect in the chorus that just kinda gets in the way of the actual song. The lyrics are fine but not the best on the album. I don't understand why this is the lead single... when it should have been this...

5. Won't Tell

My rating: 5/5 Great

Come on, this really should have been a single. This is one of my favorites on the album. The lyrics, although they're different from the common themes on the album, have actually some of the best songwriting on here. It's very relatable too. It's about unrequited love, but fearing rejection so he doesn't tell anyone. It's an interesting concept, and while the lyrics are the highlight, this song does a great job with production as well. I will never understand why this wasn't a single, because this could have easily been the biggest hit from the album... that is, if this album had any songs that become "big hits", which it unfortunately doesn't seem to.

6. Upper Hand

My rating: 5/5 Great

I think this is actually my favorite song from the album. Some of my complaints about previous songs was that the production felt too generic or sounded like other songs, but this one has a unique sound to it that's part of what makes it so amazing. It starts with a slow synthy sound, and evolves as it goes along, and it sounds wonderful. Once again, this album also has great songwriting, which shines a lot here on one of the more reflective and darker songs on here. Fantastic song, probably my favorite.

7. Waiting for Stevie

My rating: 5/5 Great

Interesting title. Apparently it's a reference to how they waited in the studio for Stevie Wonder so he could play harmonica on one of their previous songs. Don't know how that's related to this song, but it's a great song nonetheless. This is one of those songs where the lyrics are very simple but it works so well, with repeated chorus lines like "You can be loved by everyone and not feel, not feel love". In terms of production, this song is kind of split into two parts, where the ending sounds completely different. I love how the ending sounds, even though it's a transition into this next song...

8. Running

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Okay... when I listened to the album for the first time, I legit thought this was an interlude, but I looked it up and... it's a single? It's only two minutes long. Usually if I ever complain about a song length, it won't be related to the length itself as much as just whether it feels like it goes somewhere in the duration of the song. A lot of (but certainly not all) short songs tend to fail that, as they don't quite have enough time to properly evolve. While I understand why this song is a lot shorter, it would have been better if they did more interesting things in that time. Otherwise, it literally just feels like an interlude. Like with Wreckage however, it's not terrible just because it doesn't change much. There are still good things to be found here, like obviously the lyrics, which I keep mentioning because they're kinda a highlight of this entire album. But still, it falls a bit flat and could have been much better.

9. Something Special

My rating: 4/5 Good

So, this one's fine. It's definitely not a great song, but it's not bad at all. I like how the production sounds here, and it's a lot different from the other songs here. However, it mostly falls short in terms of lyrics. While I like the message here, the songwriting just feels kinda basic and not in the best way. But I guess there's nothing all that bad about it. I really don't have much to say about this one, so let's move on.

10. Got to Give

My rating: 5/5 Great

Alright, we're already almost done, and the last two tracks are great. Sure, this one may not be the most memorable song out there or anything, but it feels like a great almost-end of the album. The lyrics are, once again, pretty simple, but it works in a way similarly to Waiting for Stevie. So obviously I like the writing here a lot. The production seems to support that pretty well also. Again, not much to say, but it's just a solid song overall.

11. Setting Sun

My rating: 5/5 Great

Well, we've reached the album closer. This is another personal favorite of mine, and I can't think of a better song to end the album. This is one of those songs on this album that's really long but doesn't get boring. It starts with some quiet drums but it picks up by the end and doesn't feel repetitive. The vocals are interesting here, as Eddie seems to stay mostly in a lower register here, which I haven't heard him do often, and it sounds great. The lyrics are well-written, the length doesn't take away from anything... one of my favorite songs from the album for sure.

Conclusion

Overall album rating: 87% (Great Album)

So it may be on the lower end of the "great" category for me, but the important thing is that it's still great. Every song was at least somewhat decent, and a lot of them were amazing. It's a weird album for me to review, and just a weird album in general, but I'm glad I reviewed it because... well, it was completely overshadowed by the other album that came out the same day and I thought it deserved a few listens so TTPD doesn't steal all the attention ever.

Favorite songs: Scared of Fear, Won't Tell, Upper Hand, Waiting for Stevie, Got to Give, Setting Sun

"Least" favorite songs: Wreckage, Running

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!

{3,000 Views Special Pt.3} I really wanted to review this album, even though it was released almost 700 midnights ago

Hi! So, this is the only "older" album in the series. And by "older" I mean 2022. Midnights by Taylor Swift. You all know Taylor Swift, and you all know that I've recently become a Swiftie, but what you may not know is that since it released, I've considered Midnights one of my top three favorite albums of hers, along with Speak Now & Red. But even one of the greatest albums by one of the greatest pop stars isn't perfect. So let's get into the review!

1. Lavender Haze

My rating: 2/5 Mediocre

*sighs* Yet another album with a very weak opening track. Trust me, it will get better. I will admit, this grew on me since I first heard it. I finally understand the concept of the lyrics, which is actually pretty solid. It's essentially about trying to ignore what the general public thinks of a relationship, and just staying in the "lavender haze", which was apparently a common slang term a long time ago meaning intense love. But production-wise, this song as a whole falls flat. It's extremely boring and empty, and never feels like it goes anywhere. There are some Taylor songs with relatively empty-sounding production, like I Forgot that You Existed, Lover, and Karma, just to name a few, that I still find enjoyable because they at least do some interesting things. This one just feels completely bland. However, it's not quite as terrible as I initially thought.

2. Maroon

My rating: 5/5 Great

Alright, here's our first of many great songs on this album. This one seems to be a fan favorite. I consider this the sequel to Red, a Taylor Swift song that I admit to liking more than I probably should. This is like the better, more mature version of Red. First of all, the title is very similar, in that it's a one-word title describing a shade of red. In the original Red, she uses color related metaphors like "Losing him was blue like I'd never known / Missing him was dark gray all alone / Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met, but loving him was red". But in this song, instead of using different colors, she just uses different shades of red to represent different aspects of their relationship, and it's done so cleverly. "The burgundy on my T-shirt when you splashed your wind into me / And how the blood rushed into my cheeks, so scarlet it was / The mark they saw on my collarbone / The rust that grew between telephones / The lips I used to call home / So scarlet, it was maroon." And that's just the chorus. Throughout the verses she uses yet more red imagery, such as wine, sunset, flowers, and rubies. I will often listen to Red and then Maroon consecutively, to show the evolution of her songwriting with a similar concept. Great song.

3. Anti-Hero

My rating: 5/5 Great

We all know this one. It's the lead single and biggest hit from Midnights. Oftentimes I tend to like singles a lot less than the rest of the album, not necessarily because of overplay, but more so because of I'm not a huge fan of the certain type of songs that tend to become more successful on radio. This is not one of those. This is a great song. It may not be the best one from the album, but it's still amazing. I'm kinda shocked this was such a hit considering it's not one of the most upbeat songs here, but I think that's great because it shows that not all songs Taylor releases as singles have to sound like Shake it Off or Blank Space.

4. Snow on the Beach (featuring Lana Del Rey)

My rating: 5/5 Great

Wow, this album has a lot of great songs. I'm not super familiar with Lana's music, but I like what I've heard. But... as many of you already know, she hardly sings on this song. She features so little that the Late Night deluxe edition of this album includes a remix of this song, literally labeled as "featuring more Lana Del Rey". I don't think I have a preference for either one, it's just a great song either way. It's about the rare occurrence of two people falling in love, comparing it to snow on the beach. It may not be my favorite from the album but it's quite great.

5. You're On Your Own, Kid

My rating: 5/5 Great

You probably already know this, but Taylor Swift tends to put a very emotive and vulnerable song as track 5 on her albums (other examples are Cold as You, White Horse, Dear John, All Too Well, All You Had To Do Was Stay, Delicate, The Archer, My Tears Ricochet, Tolerate It, and So Long London), and this is another great one. I don't love it quite as much as some people do, but it's quite fantastic. Like the title suggests, it's written from the perspective of a kid who longs for love but realizes they are on their own. The storytelling here is incredible and the atmospheric production perfectly supports it. Yet another great song.

6. Midnight Rain

My rating: 5/5 Great

Come on, why does everybody hate this song? It's so good! Literally one of my top five favorites from this album. Okay, I guess I can understand why people may not love this one as much as some of the others, because of the more basic production and pitch-shifted vocals, but like... it doesn't deserve all the hate. The production may be kind of empty, but it sounds perfect. A song like this shouldn't have crazy explosive production. I really like the synth sound it uses here. The weird vocal effects don't get in the way at all. Really the only time vocal effects get in the way for me is when they're really loud and distracting from the lyrics, which is not the case here. The lyrics in this song actually really shine. It's quite well-written, and very relatable. It's about a relationship where two people want different things, especially one where one person wants to focus more on their career. The chorus is simple but effective, and the verses are even better. I love this song so much, and I wish it was more popular.

7. Question...?

My rating: 4/5 Good

So, this one's just alright. I like the production, but it is kinda weird-sounding at times. The lyrics are well-written but I just don't quite understand what it's about. Obviously, there are Swift songs that I enjoy even though I don't entirely understand the message, such as The Bolter, and I still like this song, but... it just doesn't quite match up to a lot of the unbelievably amazing songs on this album. Still enjoyable tho.

8. Vigilante Shit

My rating: 3/5 Decent

Interesting title. So, this is another song that I don't really get. The lyrics are just about... well, revenge. Taylor has some good revenge songs, but this one is just meh. A lot of what brings this one down for me is just the production. It's got even less to it than Lavender Haze. Literally the whole song is monotone vocals over a repetitive electronic beat and just one or two occasional synth notes here and there. But the reason it gets a higher score than Lavender Haze is because even though the production does less, it sounds a bit better to me. So, this is one of my least favorite songs on the album, but it's not bad.

9. Bejeweled

My rating: 5/5 Great

From what I've seen this one seems to be a fan favorite. While I do think it's overrated, I still think it's a great song. It's about a concept that I don't think Taylor has done much of: about facing challenges but still being able to party and have fun. The only other song that comes to mind when I think of that concept is Shake It Off. I like Shake It Off more than a lot of people do, but I like this one better, mostly because the dreamy synth production here is a bit stronger. Another great song.

10. Labyrinth

My rating: 5/5 Great

I think this is my favorite song from the original main album. There is one 3am track that I like a bit better than this, which we'll get to in a second. But this is still one of my top 30 Taylor songs I think, yet somehow it's one of the least streamed songs from Midnights. The production is just incredible. It's very dreamy-sounding, but with those occasional loud bursts of sound, and it evolves by the end. This is one of those Taylor songs with very simple lyricism, but it's really effective here. I don't think I need to say much, it's just one of the best songs on the album.

11. Karma

My rating: 4/5 Good

Another fan favorite single from the album, and one of two Midnights songs that hit #1 on Hits 1. I just checked, and Taylor's surprisingly only had five Hits 1 #1s in the 2020s so far (this, Anti-Hero, Cruel Summer, Mr. Perfectly Fine, and Willow). But that's unrelated. As for my opinion on this song, it faded on me since I first heard it, but it's still good. The production is good but it would have been better if it had a bit more evolution, and here it feels a bit boring at times. The lyrics are kinda nonsensical but that's the whole point, and it's done pretty well here. This is a severely unpopular opinion, but if I'm being totally 100% honest here, I ever so slightly prefer the Ice Spice remix over the solo version. But both of them would receive a 4/5 rating.

12. Sweet Nothing

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, I originally didn't love this one, because the production feels a bit more basic and boring. But I've grown to really like it. It's such a sweet song, and I love that she and her boyfriend at the time Joe Alwyn wrote this song together. The lyrics are, like a lot of the songs on this album, simple but effective, and the message here is great. The production here may not be the greatest on the album, but I feel like it complements a song like this very well. Great song.

13. Mastermind

My rating: 5/5 Great

Ah yes, the ultimate Taylor Swift scheming song. It's all about the beginning of a relationship and how it was all part of an elaborate trap, which her new partner has fallen into. Taylor Swift really is a mastermind, and this song proves it. This is a very random comparison, which I do a lot, but I think this song kind of reminds me of my second favorite Taylor Swift song (which I won't tell you, but I would be interested to hear anyone's totally crazy guesses), as they are both kind of about a scheme for love, although they are definitely very different songs. This one is much more mature, elaborate, and focused on said topic, while my second favorite Taylor Swift song (again, I won't reveal it but it'd be interesting to hear someone guess what it is) is more rawly overdramatic and is less about mastermind scheming but more about crazy fantasies for how love will happen.

3am edition

14. The Great War

My rating: 5/5 Great

This one seems to be a lot of people's favorite, and while it's not my favorite, I certainly understand the appeal, as it's a great song, and a great opening to the 3am edition of the album. It's about a major conflict during a relationship, which is compared here to the Great War. The production matches it quite well and obviously I love the way it sounds. I don't need to say much here, it's just another great song.

15. Bigger than the Whole Sky

My rating: 5/5 Great

Yes. This is the one. This is easily my favorite song on the entirety of Midnights, any edition, and one of my favorites of Taylor's discography. This seems to be one of most people's least favorites, simply because it's one of three contenders for the saddest song of her whole discography, along with Ronan and Soon You'll Get better, for obvious reasons. But I love sad songs, so those are all some of my favorites of Taylor's career. I won't spend too much time talking about this one, it's just a heartbreakingly beautiful song, and I love it. If you don't love this type of song, that's fine. I just personally love listening to really sad music, so this is definitely not a skip for me.

16. Paris

My rating: 4/5 Good

Okay... this is a weird song to place after that song. We go straight from the saddest song on the album to the happiest song on the album. So, I get what this one's going for. It's like the better version of Lavender Haze, about being in love and blocking out distractions in the outside world. I like this significantly more than Lavender Haze, but it's not quite great. Really the only thing that takes me out of it is the chorus. I guess she literally couldn't think of any other words that rhyme with Paris other than "somewhere-else". Ferris, heiress, Harris... nope, "somewhere-else".

17. High Infidelity

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, this song is about a concept Taylor talks about a lot in her music (cheating), but this one goes very in-depth about it. I think this is my favorite cheating-related song Taylor has made. The metaphors here are all related to music terminology, so this song is thought to be about Taylor's DJ ex-boyfriend Calvin Harris. I particularly love the line "There's many different ways that you can kill the one you love / The slowest way is never loving them enough". The distorted synth production works really well here also. Great song.

18. Glitch

My rating: 5/5 Great

I think it's worth mentioning that this is track 5 of the 3am songs. Obviously this wasn't an intentional decision, as emotionally, it doesn't function like a usual track 5. But still interesting. As for my opinion on the song itself, it's another great one. The production here is unusual, but in a great way. The glitchy sounds perfectly support the theme of a metaphorical "glitch" expressed in the song. Conceptually, it's somewhat similar to Labyrinth, about a relationship that wasn't quite meant to be. And I really like the lyrics here a lot. So, this is one of my favorites, and a very underrated track on this album.

19. Would've, Could've, Should've

My rating: 5/5 Great

This one seems to be one of a lot of people's favorites from the album. While I wouldn't consider it one of my favorites per se, it's still a great song. This song is actually thought to be about her relationship with John Mayer, which she doesn't talk about much on her recent albums as they broke up over 10 years ago. Some of the lyrics are really hard-hitting, like the repeated refrain of "I regret you all the time". Honestly, I think this should have been the track 5 on the 3am edition, but I understand why Taylor may not have been thinking as much about the order of the bonus tracks as with the main album.

20. Dear Reader

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, this seems to be the least streamed song on Midnights. I don't know why, because it's yet another great song. The lyrics here are interesting, as they are directly addressing the listener and giving life advice, but are meant to not be trusted. This is one of those songs that I don't entirely understand the message of, but I enjoy a decent amount. And I love how the understated synth-pop production sounds here. Not much to say for this one, it's just a solid song overall.

Other bonus tracks (Til Dawn/Late Night editions)

Hits Different

My rating: 5/5 Great

So, I excluded the remixes of SOTB and Karma, because they are just too similar to the original songs and the few changes made in them don't drastically affect my opinion, so it's not entirely fair to count them towards the album score. But I decided to include these two songs, because they're actual unique songs included on some editions of Midnights. The reason they don't have track numbers is because they are only placed on different versions of the album. Both of these additional bonus tracks are great songs. I'm honestly shocked this one wasn't included on the main album. It's a classic example of Taylor taking a common phrase and completely changing the meaning. Usually, if something "hits different", that means it is extraordinarily great. However, in the context of this song, which is about a breakup, she uses it to mean it was extraordinarily bad. Conceptually, the idea of struggling to move on from a relationship expressed in this song reminds me of what is easily one of my top 13 favorite Taylor songs, Death by a Thousand Cuts. Great song that should've been on the regular album.

You're Losing Me

My rating: 5/5 Great

You may not remember this, but in mid-2023, back before it was even on streaming platforms, this song was on Hits 1 for months. It was obviously not on the countdown or even Hitbound, just in the abyss for a while, but it did make one of the prank countdowns. I guess I understand why this wasn't much of a radio hit, considering it's one of her most heartbreaking songs about a breakup, comparing it to death throughout the song, but it should've been. On top of the lyrics which are obviously fantastically written, the production sounds great too. This song has just what I like to see in a good Taylor song. There's enough to it that it's not empty and it feels like it evolves as it goes on, but not too much crazy explosive stuff that it distracts from the deep emotion in the lyrics. Another wonderful song.

Conclusion

Midnights rating: 89% (Great Album)

Bonus tracks rating: 98% (Great Album)

Overall album rating: 94% (Great Album)

Interesting. This album unexpectedly got the same score as TTPD, which just so happens to be 94, which is one of my favorite numbers (don't ask why).

Favorite songs: Labyrinth, Bigger than the Whole Sky

"Least" favorite song: Lavender Haze

That's all for now! Byeeeeeeeeee!